Points of View

I recently had a conversation with one of my friends from the US. The topic was on how people looked at things. At that time, she was writing a paper on the religion of the Argonauts (don’t ask me what this means because I’m as clueless as you) She was saying that they practised magic but took it as their religion but some people felt otherwise, that this was not religion but black magic practise. And I said, “Well, different people look at things differently” and she agreed.

All of us have different way of looking at things. One of the famous adage would be the “half full” or “half empty” glass perspective. To some, the glass may be half empty but to some it may be half full. It is all a matter of perspective. No one is wrong or at fault for looking at things the way they see it. How we look at things are conditioned by our upbringing and social exposure. Just because someone sees things differently from us doesn’t mean they’re wrong and we are right and vice versa. It is all a matter of perspective.

One of the things that helped me to look at both sides of the coin is a subject which I learnt in the first year of my seminary training. It was called TA – Transactional Analysis. This has nothing with financial transaction or analysis. This analysis helps us to look at the three levels of behaviour a person might be communicating from. Labelled PAC, they are Parent, Adult and Child. Being able to analyse from which level the other individual is communicating from and also looking at where we are communicating from will help us to bring the level of communication to the same level. Of course, this is easier said than done.

Perhaps it would be easier if an example is given. Let us say that A and B are talking to each other. As the conversation progresses, it becomes more and more heated and there is danger of eruption on both sides. At this instance, either A or B needs to see where the other person is coming from. If one of them know how to analyse the way the other way is talking and acting, then he/she can determine at level the other person is at. Let us say that A is talking at the level of an adult and B is talking at the level of a child, the challenge then would be for A to bring B up to the level of an adult or A has to lower himself to the level of a child. It is only when the two parties are talking at the same level that effective communication can take place.

Of course, the best level of communication would be between adult and adult. Parents often sound more authoritative and commanding and a child very often acts, well, like a child. So to have a fruitful conversation, both parties must be brought to the adult state. This is, of course, difficult to do as many of us do not know how to do it. I personally find it hard at times too as my ego kicks in and I start fighting fire with fire. But this will not help because emotions often cloud our rationality and we will not be able to see the other person’s point of view. We would think that we are in the right and the other person is in the wrong. And we would go all the way to prove that the person is indeed wrong. This is why so many relationships and friendships breakdown because we would not or are unable to see the other person’s viewpoint.

In the gospels, Jesus says something about seeing the point of view of others. “Why do you observe the splinter in your brother's eye and never notice the great log in your own?” (Mt 7:3) We usually have the tendency to think that we are right and others are wrong. But not everyone is like that, all of us, however, are like that to a certain degree. Whether we like it or not, this is what we are and we have to learn to accept that sometimes we just don’t want to see the other person’s view.

The greatest challenge would be for us to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes and see things from their perspective. It is very difficult to do so because many a times, we do not know what exactly the other person is thinking about. But if we can make an effort to try, the result would be amazing. I have experienced this before and it is indeed very rewarding to be able to see and understand where the other person is coming from. The question still remains, will we or would we want to see the point of view of others? That is the $50,000 question.

To conclude, I’d like to include a quote from a therapist I used to see during my seminary days – her name is Sr Cyrilla Baptist, FMDM. She used to tell us to “phrase our words or questions in such a way that would help both the parties to grow” Indeed, when we are able to see the viewpoint of others, we will be able to help ourselves and the other party to grow too. If we are able to do that to every person we meet, we can help in making this world a better place to live in.

Reflections in the Mirror

Have you ever had the experience of looking at yourself in the mirror and not liking what you see? It’s like, you look at your reflection in the mirror and you do not like your own reflection. Personally, I have gone through this experience before. A few years ago while I was brushing my teeth and looked into the mirror. What I saw was a reflection of me but with a frown on my face. And I did not like it at all. Even when I’m having my hair cut, I really do not like what I see in the mirror either. And that made me wonder why I dislike my reflection so much.

Mirrors are reflections of our physical self. In Disney’s Mulan, there is a song which I particularly like called Reflection. Part of the lyrics goes like this

“Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide who I am though I've tried
When will my reflection show who I am inside?”

I think that the lyrics really reflect what we see in ourselves. We look into the mirror and we often see someone we do not know. And we will always wonder when will we see the true us reflected in the mirror. At least I do. A Jesuit friend of mine once told me that what is manifested physically is the manifestation of our internal self. I think that the statement has some truth in it.

I believe that there are many out there who do not like what they see in the mirror. If everyone was happy, we wouldn’t have plastic surgeons and the likes. But precisely because we are not happy with what we see that we put on heavy make ups, fake eye lashes, reconstruct our faces etc. Are we saying that God did a bad job with us when he created us?

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not against cosmetics or plastic surgery, Cosmetics add flavour to ones outlook but we should go overboard and make as if like we just dipped our entire face into a sack of flour.

The normal mirror reflects what we can see physically. But what if we had a mirror which could reflect our internal self? Would we like what we see? Would it be worse than we can see physically? And if it is worse, will we try to give it a complete makeover? Or will we reject it and replace it with something which is false?

Gerard W. Hughes, SJ, in his book, God of Surprises, says this “If we could really see into the depths of ourselves and into our subconscious and unconscious minds, we would recognise in ourselves all the characteristics of the (Gerasene) demoniac, and this would terrify us, but we would also see all other qualities which would delight us…Because we are afraid of looking at the evil possibilities in us, we fail also to too see our true greatness. Refusing to look at our inner lives, we ignore our true selves, renouncing our individuality, our personality..”

There are many people in this world who would go all the way to mask their own feelings and try to be whom they are not. But try as we may, we can never run away from ourselves. Sooner or later, our inner selves will be full of conflicts and chaos and confusion and ultimately destruction. Am I exaggerating? That question can only be answered by each and every one of us, for only we know what transpires in our inner thoughts and feelings.

Perhaps we fear that if we really share what is deep inside us, we will face rejection by others. But feelings are just feelings; they are neither right nor wrong. So why should we fear rejection? Or perhaps we fear that what is evil and chaotic in us will overpower us and take over our lives and we will have no control over it. Certainly there is the danger of our inner conflicts and chaos running amok.

So how do we prevent or inner conflicts and emotions from running wild? The answer, simple as it may seem, is in reality difficult to do. Lay our feelings bare before Jesus. Give him all our insecurities, our conflicts and let him take over. Let him make sense of it and allow his light to shine into the darkest parts of our inner being. Sounds simple but it is really very difficult to do. At one point or another, we want to be in the driver’s seat, to be in control, we allow God to come in but on our own terms. But that will not help us. Surrendering ourselves fully is step towards recognising that we cannot be in control and that only God can heal our inner selves.

And in then end, the illuminating light of God will be like the light at the end of a tunnel, giving us a way out of our darkness and leading us into the light of God’s love and a life that is truly full and alive. So look into the mirror of our souls and examine ourselves closely. Let the light of God shine into our inner beings and it will light up what is dark and turn it into light.

A Reflection on Ps 50...

There is a legend that the Queen of Sheba once sent two wreaths of roses to King Solomon. One was genuine and the other was artificial. According to the legend, she defied Solomon to detect which was artificial and which was genuine.
Solomon opened the window and let in a swarm of bees, which at once settled on the wreath of real roses.
This is similar to our hearts. Our hearts are like the flowers and God is like the swarm of bees. And he knows whether our hearts are true or false.
I always ask myself, when I worship God, am I doing it because my heart tells me to or is it because I want to show that I am holy? Am I sincere in my worship of God?
The psalmist of Ps 50 says "A pure heart create for me O God, put a steadfast spirit within me. A we pray in our daily lives, let these words be a part of our prayer to God, asking him to give us purity of heart.

Ambassadors for Christ

About 4 years ago, while doing some window shopping in the now closed down Jaya Supermarket, I came across a stall selling Christian stuff (t shirts, caps etc) One of the interesting wares that was being sold was a cap with the legend “Ambassadors for Christ” emblazoned on it. I found it to be interesting and had wanted to buy it but found it too costly at that time.

The thought that ran through my mind was this “Would anyone dare to wear this cap in public?” At that time I thought it was cool and radical if one were to wear things like that. But that aside, I wonder how many of us would be daring enough to put that cap on?

During the recent World Youth Day in Sydney, I saw the answer to that question. Everywhere, pilgrims, young and old, from all around the world gathered in Sydney and put on caps or t shirts which legends like “I Love Benedict XVI” and the likes. This goes to show that Christ is very much alive in this world and we are all proud to be his followers. But is it enough just to wear t shirts, caps etc? What we wear externally does not always show what is in us. Are we willing to go further than this? Jesus, during his earthly ministry appointed 12 apostles and later on 72 disciples to preach in his name and continue his mission. This mission has since been handed down through the generations.

I remember reading a story a few years ago. It tells of a young girl being asked what Jesus’ followers were called. The girl, who could not remember the proper word, answered “Samples” That answer may bring smiles or perhaps laughter from us but when we think of it, the answer is essentially correct. After all, we are called to be Christ to others, to bring his love to all around us. Isn’t that what a sample is? A foretaste of the real thing?

The word "Apostle" comes from the Greek word apostello, which means "to send forth", "to dispatch". Apostolos (Apostle) means one who is sent forth, dispatched--in other words, who is entrusted with a mission, rather, a foreign mission. It has, however, a stronger sense than the word messenger, and means as much as a delegate. Christ, in the Act of the Apostles, sends down the Holy Spirit and entrusts us to be his witnesses throughout the whole world (cf Acts 1:8)

George Cardinal Pell, in his homily for the opening Mass of World Youth Day 2008 says, “The call of the one true God remains mysterious, especially today when many good people find it hard to believe. Even in the time of the prophets many of their hearers remained spiritually deaf and blind, while any number over the ages have admired the beauty of Jesus’ teaching, but never been moved to answer his call.

Our task is to be open to the power of the Spirit, to allow the God of surprises to act through us. Human motivation is complex and mysterious, because sometimes very strong Catholics, and other strong Christians, can be prayerful and regularly good, but also very determined not to take even one further step. On the other hand, some followers of Christ can be much less zealous and faithful, but open to development, to change for the better because they realise their unworthiness and their ignorance. Where do you stand?

Whatever our situation we must pray for an openness of heart, for a willingness to take the next step, even if we are fearful of venturing too much further. If we take God’s hand, He will do the rest. Trust is the key. God will not fail us.”

To become a witness to Christ in this day and age is not easy. The advancement of science and technology has reduced a lot of things to mere mathematical equations and scientific formulas. How do we bring Christ to a world where many people do not feel the need for religion or God? Like what Cardinal Pell says, we need to be open to the power of the Spirit, to allow God to work through us. We cannot be ambassadors for Christ if we ourselves are not open to the promptings of the Spirit.

We do not have to have the gift of preaching or evangelising to be his witnesses. As St Pauls says in his letter to the Corinthians “As it is, these remain: faith, hope and love, the three of them; and the greatest of them is love.” (cf 1 Cor 13:13) All we have to do is share God’s love to all who is around us and let God do the rest. From my own personal experience, many of my colleagues have asked me whether I’m a Christian because of the way I treat them. Then I will share with them about Christ and his love for us. Whether or not they are touched, that is God’s work. I have sown the seed and that is sufficient.

So do not be afraid to share his love. We are all that Christ has in this world to continue on his mission. He has no other plan. The ultimate question would be whether or not we are willing to do it. If we are willing then God will definitely give us the courage and strength to carry on his work here on earth.

A Reflection on Ps 130...

Starr Daily, a man who knows much about the act of spiritual healing, said "To my knowledge, no man or woman of my acquaintance who knows how to practise silence and does it, has ever been sick"
Surely, the practise of silence is more soothing and healing than most medicines available in this world. Pascal, the great scientist, said "After observing humankind over a long period of years, I come to the conclusion that one of man's great troubles is his inability to be still"
Most of us are always on the move. We love to do things, to be always actively working. I do not think that everyone can say with certainty that he or she loves silence and can keep still for long periods of time. For me, silence has become an important part of my life.
It is only through silence that the voice of God can be heard within us. The psalmist of Ps 130 says this "Truly I have set my soul in silence and peace. As a child has rest in his mother's arms, even so my soul."
If we keep on moving and talking and cannot find the time for silence and stillness, how can we listen to God's voice? It is only when we quiet down that the soft promptings of the Spirit and the voice of God can be heard.

The Power of Affirmation

“There are times when encouragement means such a lot. And a word is enough to convey it. There were others who could have as easy as not, but just the same they chose not to say it”

- Grace Stricker Dawson

One of the most valuable lessons that I learned from the recent World Youth Day was during the breakout session of the Ignatian Gathering that was held after the conclusion of the MAGiS experiments.
During that session, we met as an experiment group and one of the exercises was to affirm one another. We split into groups of four and we each had to affirm every member in that small group. The nun who was our facilitator pointed out that all of us should accept the affirmation and not deny it. So we did the exercise and all of us were affirmed by one another. It was really amazing as we only spent one week with one another and the things we saw in each other was like as if we have known each other for years.
Why do I share this experience? Most, if not most of us, go through life not realising the potential or the power of affirming those around us. And like most people, we would say things like “No, no I’m not like that” or “I think you’re mistaken as I don’t feel I’m that kind of person” etc. What we don’t realise is that statements like these will ultimately have a negative effect on our self esteem and confidence.
This has also happened to me in the past and my self esteem and self worth really took a plunge. Even during the exercise that I went through during MAGiS, I felt like saying “No, no that’s not me you’re talking about”. But I did not say it. Instead, I said thank you and accepted the affirmation. It was difficult to accept the affirmation even though I yearned for it. And I believe this happens to many people. We are simply unable to accept compliments or praise, especially when it comes to things about ourselves.
After the exercise, I felt good and humbled as well. Not just because of the affirmation that I received but also because I received them from people whom I hardly know. After all, we only spent one week together and we were all strangers to begin with. It was then that I also realised that affirmation often comes from people whom we don’t really know. Very often, people who are close to us or those whom we consider friends are the ones who do not affirm us. And vice versa.
Affirmation, therefore, is very important. It can help bring a person to the self realisation that he/she is special and appreciated. Affirmation helps a person to climb out of the pit of low self esteem and soar high above in the skies.
I’m quite sure that most of us have seen the movie “Ratatouille” before. In this movie, we can see two scenes which show the lack of affirmation and the positive impact of affirmation. The first occurs at the beginning of the movie where Remy the rat introduces himself. One of the lines was where he introduced his father and brother. And the line that introduced his father goes “This is my father, he’s NEVER impressed”
Though this is an animation, not real life, we often do not take these lines seriously. But think about it. Remy the rat’s father is never impressed with his ability to tell the different spices apart. Translate that to real life and we will get the same kind of situation. How many of us actually give affirmation sincerely? We often find criticising people more “fun” than affirmation. We can deny this until we turn blue but the fact remains that we would rather make fun of people than to affirm them in a positive way.
I myself have experienced the detrimental effects of being made fun of. Rather than being affirmed, I was made the object of fun and laughter by the people whom I thought were my friends. Foolish as my actions would be, I vowed never to join that group again. I was so disappointed with their attitude. And I believe this is quite a common situation everywhere. Affirming a person does not cost us anything, all is takes is just one good word and the positive effect and outcome is priceless.
The second scene, the affirmation one, occurs about three quarter way into the movie. The scene is where Remy the rat is trapped into a cage in a car trunk. Then out of the blue, the ghost of Chef Gusto appeared and started to talk to him. Remy then says to the dead chef “I’m sick of pretending to be a rat for dad, I’m sick of pretending to be a human to Linguini and I’m sick of pretending to be a cook for you” The dead chef just laughs and said “Ah Remy, but you never have. You never have…” and disappears.
Upon listening to these words, Remy’s face lit up and realised that he never pretended to be a cook, he had always wanted to be one. This revelation brought about by the affirmation of the dead chef, brought him to that realisation. And those who have seen the movie would know that upon being set free by his father and brother, he ran to the restaurant and shouted “Because I’m a cook…” as a response to the question from his father.
From this example, we can see the contrast between the action of affirmation and the lack of it. We may think that affirmation is not important, that it does not matter because no one does it. In this modern day and age, the world at large finds itself lacking in love and warmth. By affirming one another, we will be able to bring back that love and warmth that has been drowned out by the demands of a materialistic society.
If we want to be affirmed, then we have to start by affirming others. The song “Man in the Mirror” written by Michael Jackson is a good example of self change. In the last line of the chorus, it says “If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make the change” If we ourselves don’t change, we cannot expect others to change.
Jesus was the Son of God, St Peter called him “Messiah, Son of the Living God”, and yet, during his trying times, God sent angels to minister to him and to strengthen him. This was when he was led into the desert and during his agony in the Garden of Gethsemane. If Jesus, who was the Son of God, needed affirmation and comfort, how much more we – mere mortals – are in need of them.
George Cardinal Pell, in his homily for the opening Mass of the recent World Youth Day in Sydney says, “We will bring forth good fruit by learning the language of the Cross and inscribing it on our hearts. The language of the Cross brings us the fruits of the Spirit which Paul lists, enables us to experience peace and joy, to be regularly kind and generous to others. Following Christ is not cost free, not always easy, because it requires struggling against what St. Paul calls “the flesh”, our fat relentless egos, old fashioned selfishness.” If we can learn this language and empowered by the Holy Spirit, imagine the fruits that we can bring forth, to be kind to others and build God’s kingdom instead of halting its progress.
These words by Cardinal Pell re echo the words of St Paul in his letter to the Ephesians. He writes “No foul word should ever cross your lips; let your words be for the improvement of others, as occasion offers, and do good to your listeners.” (Eph 4:29)
As Christ said in the Gospels, “Whatever you do unto your brother, you did them to me” If we choose not to affirm one another then we have chosen to deliberately hurt Christ. If we truly believe that we are disciples of Christ, then we should choose to follow the way of Christ, to be kind to others, to strengthen them and not to belittle them. If we choose not to affirm, then we cannot expect to receive any affirmation, for it says in Luke 6:31 “Treat others as you would like people to treat you.”
To conclude, I would again draw from the words of St Paul, this time from his letter to the Thessalonians

“So give encouragement to each other, and keep strengthening one another, as you do already.” (1 Th 5:11)

The choice is ultimately ours to make.

A Reflection on Ps 62...

I still remember clearly the time when I first started work as a programmer. At that time I was the only chinese in that section. I knew that I had to prove myself. I thirsted and longed for recognition and praise.
6 months later, I was put in charge of the running of the night shift. Since they usually put experienced people to supervise the night shift, I thought to myself, "Ah, they finally recognise my ability and skills"
That feeling, however, did not last long. After a few months, it became an empty feeling. It was then that I realised that thirsting for temporal and earthly things would eventually leave me empty unsatisfied.
As the psalmist of Ps 62 says "O God, you are my God, for you I long, for you my soul is thirsting", our longing and thirsting will not be satisfied until we are reunited with God.
The question is; do we thirst for temporal things or do we thirst for something that is eternal?

Silence

Blaise Pascal once said “Man’s biggest failure is his inability to stay still”. For me, there is much wisdom in these words. There is just too little of “staying still” in this modern day and age.
Modern society tends to look at silence as something un natural, something inhuman. Many a times, I would get questions like “How do stand 8 days of silence?” Question like this comes even from my Catholic friends.
Personally, I think that many people are afraid of silence. They find silence un nerving. If you were to try doing silent reflection for young people, they would very often become agitated or restless after a few minutes. I have tried this on a group of people ranging from the age of 20 to mid thirties and most of them start to fidget after 1 or 2 minutes of silence.
Even when I was in the seminary, I found that my fellow seminarians find it difficult to keep their silence during the annual retreats.
Silence is a form of prayer. We should not be afraid or uncomfortable with it. In his book “The Prayer of the Frog”, Tony de Mello wrote of the 3 stages of prayer. The first is where we talk and God listens. This is the normal form of prayer that all of us are used to. The second stage is where God talks and we listen. This is probably more difficult it involves being silent both verbally and mentally. Not everyone can do this. The last stage is where neither talks but both listen.
The last stage may be difficult to comprehend. Let me give an example of how this can be. Sometimes when we go out for a meal with a close friend or a loved one, very often conversation is not necessary. This is because silence is enough to transmit the love that we have for the other party and vice versa.
So it is with silence. When we go into silence with God, we don’t have to use words and neither does God. All we need to do is to be still and let ourselves be engulfed by the loving presence of God. “Be still and know that I’m God” This psalm can certainly teach us many things about the value of silence.
Even Jesus needed time for prayer and silence. We read in the Gospels that he would go up to the mountains and pray alone.
Modern society loses itself because it just keeps doing and doing and doing. I’m not saying that we should not “do” but every now and then, we have to stop doing and just “be”. If we just keep doing and doing but never “being” then we would ultimately lose ourselves and become nothing more than a machine. Silence is one of the best ways to rejuvenate our bodies and ourselves. It allows our souls to catch up with our bodies.
I will always remember this story about two tourist who hires some guides to take them through some parts of Africa. They were constantly moving and moving, seldom stopping for long. One day they found their guides sitting on the ground, unwilling to move. And they would not respond to any questions or promptings.
Finally, the guides got up and said, “You white men are always in a hurry, moving here and there. We are not used to this and have to stop in order for our souls to catch up with our bodies”
And this is what silence is all about. To allow our souls to catch up with our bodies. Silence is possibly the highest form of prayer. It is difficult tp do but when we are able to do it, we will find that we will be able to rest solely in the loving presence of God and nothing else matters.

Needs and Wants

I remember when I was still in my teens, I used to watch many Reality TV Shows. Of course, these shows were much simpler back then. But the concept was very much the same; it was all about getting money by doing something. One of the most memorable ones that I remember is a show called “Supermarket Sweep” where the participants pick up points by answering questions related to supermarket items. The final round to determine the winner was where they dash through the supermarket and put as many items of value as they can into the trolley in a given time. The person with the most points wins the game and the prize money. There were many other shows of course – Wheel of Fortune, Tic Tac Dough etc – shows where people want to win money or prizes. It is certainly no different from what we have today, only the stake is much higher. What people want has increased significantly.

For me, I believe it is just a matter of needs and wants. Everyone has their own needs and wants, nothing wrong with that. Personally I think it’s quite healthy to have needs and wants, otherwise our lives will be quite meaningless. The question is – how do we differentiate between need and want? Where is the line between these two categories? When does a need become a want or vice versa? In the material world we live in today, these two words often interchange and the distinction is very often blurred by the mass media.

I remember about a year ago, my sister asked my nephew what he wanted for Christmas. Frankly I was quite taken aback when I heard the answer; he wanted a game boy (an electronic game gadget) which costs something like RM300 – RM400. And when my niece saw it, she wanted it too! And now both of them has one each and plays it very often. Imagine, children who are just 6 to 7 years old wanting things which we may never want for ourselves. What the modern generation wants is so much different from what we ourselves would have wanted when we were their age. To be honest, I don’t think I had ever wanted or demanded anything when I was that age.

We live in a world of “I want…” The list of “I want…” never ends. We continue to want things, designer clothes, branded electronic stuff, the latest cell phone model, the fastest computer or laptop, nice big cars… the list is endless. And more often than not, the list will never end until the day we die. About 10 years back, there was a song from the movie soundtrack of “Army Daze” (Singapore movie about NS) entitled “Sophisticated Baby”. The lyrics go something like this “Sophisticated baby…(that’s me, that’s me) (I want, I want leh…) (an cua boi sai ah? – literally translated meaning why cannot ah?)” It basically talks about having branded stuff to look sophisticated and cool. And I think that that kind of culture or way of thinking is fast becoming or has already become something which is very real in our country, especially among the younger generations and the yuppies.

I can list down so many more examples of this “I want..” behaviour. The point is that almost everyone of us is guilty of this, one way or another (including me) We often confuse ourselves between what is needed and what is wanted. And sometimes, we don’t even want to know or think about the distinction. Because when we start to think about the difference, we may begin to change our outlook in live. And very often, that entails a change in our lifestyle. Then again, we may not want to change; we choose to ignore our thoughts because it complicates our life.

Do we ever wonder why we have so many needs and wants in our life? I think we can safely assume that the need is important and without it, life would be difficult. These needs would include food, shelter, money and any other things which we deem necessary in order to live a normal life. This is what we call basic needs. Of course, the concept of basic needs has long expanded, what was necessary for minimal living ten years ago would be quite insufficient today. Our needs are dictated by our survival but our wants are dictated by our ego.

In the gospel of Matthew, Jesus tells us not to worry about the things in our life. (cf Mt 6:25-34) Again, I’m not saying that we should not have any wants. Wants are perfectly normal but how much we want is the determining factor. There are many people in this world who would forsake their faith or neglect God in the pursuit of what they want.

“Seek ye first…” again this phrase comes in. We do not realise that by neglecting our faith and seeking worldly gains, we are only cheating ourselves. When we learn to seek the will of God and His righteousness, He will grant us many blessings that are always much more than what we can dare to think of! Having material goods and wealth will not make us happy or contented. Even if it does, it will eventually dry up. By seeking God’s kingdom first, “…all other things will be added unto you”, it may not be wealth, fame or honour but peace, happiness, love, joy and little simple things in life and it is these that make our lives complete, whole and worth living.

We read of how King Solomon asked for wisdom instead of riches, what would we have asked for if we were him? ( cf 1 Kgs 3:5-14) Solomon knew that he needed wisdom to govern his people, and because he asked what was pleasing to God, God gave him even more than what he asked for. This is what it by the verse “seek ye first”. If we constantly seek what is pleasing to God, he, in return, will give us much more than we can ever want or imagine. Money and wealth is important but the one thing I have personally learnt throughout my life is that it does not necessarily bring happiness. Money certainly can’t buy us love. And if God were to really ask us of what we want from him, how many of us will actually ask of what we need?

At the end of 1992, local singer/song writer Eric Moo wrote a song titled “hong chen lai qu yi chan meng” (loosely translated – the riches of the world comes and goes like a dream) which tells of the emptiness of the material world. It says that the material the coming and passing of the material world is just a dream and empty. If someone who is not a Christian can write something so profound, then so much more we should be able to see through the illusion of material wealth.

To conclude I’d like to draw upon the words of St Paul to Timothy

“Religion, of course, does bring large profits, but only to those who are content with what they have. We brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it, but as long as we have food and clothing, we shall be content with that.

People who long to be rich are a prey to trial; they get trapped into all sorts of foolish and harmful ambitions which plunge people into ruin and destruction. The love of money is the root of all evils and there are some, who, pursuing it, have wandered away from the faith and so given their souls any number of fatal wounds. (cf 1Tim 6:10-12)

Love and Action Through Prayer

What is prayer? How do we define it? If we look at the Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary, one of it’s definitions for prayer is a solemn request to God or any symbol of worship. That, in itself is very broad. How do you communicate a request to God? Verbally? Written? There are so many ways to pray.

Silence can be a form of prayer when there is communication with both man and God. Even though both parties do not talk, there is a profound form of communication that takes place. We always look at prayer as a form of verbal or written communication. That is only two forms of prayer.

When we go for Mass, we pray. When we sing praises to God during our Praise and Worship, our prayer is two times more powerful, as Saint Augustine would put it. He says that when we sing, we pray twice and the angels of heaven would stop their singing and praising so that they can hear us sing.

When we are in communion with one another, that is also a form of prayer. Thus, as long as the act that we carry out gives praise and glory to God, it is prayer. But how does prayer lead us to love?

When we pray, we normally pray for others, we seldom just pray for ourselves. When we want to love someone, we normally want to give them what we want best for them. Hence we pray for our loved ones. That is how we express our love for one another. Even Jesus, God and yet human, endured so much suffering for the sake of his beloved people, still prays for people who rejected him.

It is very difficult to love; there is no doubt about that. How the world sees love is different from how Christians see love. Our love is the love of Christ, not the lustful love the world knows and teaches.

In the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius, love is mentioned as “a mutual communication between the two persons. That is, the one who loves gives and communicates to the beloved what he or she has, or a part of what one has or can have; and the beloved in return does the same to the lover. Thus if the one has knowledge, one gives it to the other who does not; and similarly in regard to honours or riches. Each shares with the other” (Ex 231)

We can see from the quote above that love is not only a thought but also action. It is further mentioned that “love ought to manifest itself more by deeds than words” (Ex 230). This further emphasises that love is most effective conveyed through action. But love can be very demanding. It demands our whole being to be able to love unconditionally and without reservation and the cost. Christ taught us that the greatest commandment is to love one another as He has loved us. Again, we can see that it is the act of love that He is emphasising on, not mere words. Anybody can talk about love, but how many are actually doing it? Love without action is empty.

How do we show our love? If you ask someone who is very worldly, he’ll probably tell you to have sex; such is how love is perceived in the world today. The form of love that we should show is totally different from what the world teaches. In the Bible, it is stated that the greatest love that a man can show for his fellow man is to die for him. And Jesus did just that, He died for us all so that our sins may be forgiven. He ransomed His live for many, and that is the kind of love we are called to show.

Serving one another is one of the simplest ways to show our love. It does not even have to be big things. Giving a hug, giving a smile, a simple hello or how are you….simple things that do not cost anything at all. Sending occasional emails and sms during special occasion, cheering a friend up. The choices are limitless. The only thing is whether we care enough to do it or not. And love definitely requires strength and perseverance to do it. Even Jesus had to pray everyday to His Father for grace and strength. If Jesus, who is God needs to pray, how much more we, weak as we are, needs to pray.

Without prayer, we are nothing. Our love would be empty expressions of what we perceive as Christ’s love. Without prayer, our action would just be that of any paid social worker in the welfare department. Thus, if we want to love, we need to pray. Pray for grace to love unconditionally, no matter who we come across, even if we hate that person, if we pray for the grace and strength to love like Jesus did, God will grant us that grace. For where love is, God is. We must not be afraid to love or be ashamed to show our love for one another.

When we have the grace and strength to love, we can then share it with others through our action. A very good example would be Blessed Theresa of Calcutta. Before she answered her call within a call, she was afraid and unsure of her second calling. And she prayed, she prayed for grace and strength and conviction to answer her call. Throughout her years serving the poorest of the poor, she never ceased to pray. Many people who have died in her arms said that they have never experienced so much love in their life.

There are many other countless examples, some of it includes St. Francis of Assisi, St Clare and many others. All of them shared their love by doing something, not just talking but acting it out with the grace obtained from prayer. So it is with us, if we want to love and show it through our action, we must pray.

Another example would be this: if we see a friend in sickness and we want to show our love for him, what would we do? Do we say “I’ll pray for you”? Will that show our love for him? Of course not, anybody can say “I’ll pray for you” We show our love by being there with him, taking care of him, helping him eat and so forth. It is our action which will show our love for him, not words. Anybody can talk.

So prayer is very important. Without prayer, we will not have the courage, grace and strength to love. And without love, we cannot serve one another genuinely through our action. You can always give without loving, but you can never love without giving.

Hurt

Hurt

No one wants to be hurt, either physically or emotionally. But whether we like it or not, hurt is something which happens frequently in our lives. What is hurt? One of the definitions in the dictionary is mental pain or suffering. But most of the time, we experience it emotionally rather than mentally.

When we hurt, others around us suffer. It is the human tendency to always make others hurt when they are also hurt. And often, it is the ones closest to us whom we hurt. Ask ourselves and be honest, how often have we hurt our family members or close ones than our friends? We never want to bear our hurt alone and so we pass it on to others.

Why do I say we suffer from our hurt? To quote Yoda (Star Wars I), he said that anger leads to hate and hate leads to suffering. When we hurt, we become angry. Angry because we think that life is unfair that we are the ones to be hurt and not others. We are angry because we think that God has purposely let us experience that hurt. We are angry because others are enjoying themselves and we are suffering from our pain. And most of the time, we tend to keep that hurt to ourselves, we don’t let others know that we are hurting because of our pride. We are too proud to ask for help.

When we become angry, we begin to hate. We hate the life we are living, we try to make others feel miserable because of the poisonous seed of hate that is in us. Misery loves a company, as the saying goes. We love to make others suffer when we suffer. Such is the nature of humans these days.

I was chatting in a Catholic chat room the other day. Someone shared that her son became angry at God for taking his best friend away from him. He is always angry when someone mentions that it’s God’s will.

Which brings us to the question of why God wants us to experience hurt and suffering. Throughout the Bible, we can see that God made his people suffer so that he can show them his love and power. Then again, we may ask, why should God do that? If he’s really loving, why should he make his people suffer? One of the answer is sin. (cf Rom 7:14-20)

It was sin that caused Adam and Eve to fall. Throughout human history, sin has caused so much misery and suffering that we wonder why humans like to inflict so much hurt. I believe that sin is one of the main causes of hurt. Either we sin or others have sinned against us. But you may ask, what about those who do not commit sins which causes hurt? Saints like St Francis Xavier and St Therese of the Child Jesus hurt too and yet they are among the holiest of people. (cf Rom 8:17) When we hurt and suffer, we too share in the glory of Jesus’ cross. Ultimately, we redeem our hurts for a place in heaven. The more we suffer now, the less time we spend in purgatory.

When I hurt, I always want to find someone whom I can share it with. Not in the bad way but just to pour it out. It is always good to talk to someone when we experience hurt, no matter how deep. It may not help much but it will relieve us of the burden that we carry through our hurt. If we go on keeping our hurt, sooner or later, it will explode, and everyone including us will suffer badly. We are like pressure cookers, we can only take so much, and once the limit is reached…you can imagine for yourself what will happen.

But how many of us share our hurt and pain with Jesus? How many of us actually trust in him to take away our hurts? When Jesus died on the cross, he took all our sins, our pains, our sufferings, everything that is harmful to us and he wiped it all away. Why shouldn’t he do it for us now? All we have to do is ask…ask and you will receive. He is our Lord but he is also our friend. Just like the story of the footprints in the sand, he will come to us during our most difficult moments. Until and unless we open our hearts for him to enter, our hurt will not go away. It has to go both ways; Jesus cannot come and help us if we do not want to help ourselves. The first step in conquering hurt is to open our hearts to Jesus. How long it takes for our wounds to heal will depend on us. If we choose to prolong our hurt, it will never go away. If we choose to give it all up to Jesus and go on with life, we’ll definitely make it go away. If Jesus never remembers our past sins and mistakes, then why should we keep it?

Our hurts are like stones tied round our ankles. Until and unless we throw the stone away, we can never be free of that burden. Once we have thrown it away, don’t look back. But the most important thing is to always trust Jesus and offer him all our hurts. In the end, only He can take away our hurts if we let him.

“I was angry with my friend, I told my wrath and it did end. I was angry with my foe, I told it not, my wrath did grow” William Blake

A Reflection on Psalm 140...

When I first watched "The Matrix" in 1999, I did not understand much about the movie. Though it was entertaining, it was a little too complicated for me.

However, one of the things that struck me about the movie was this; everytime they needed to go back to their world, all they had to do was to call "home" and they would be told to go to a certain place and lift up the hpone.

In Ps 140, the psalmist says this "I have called to you, Lord; hasten to help me. Hear my voice when I cry to you." Do we call on God when we are in trouble and when everything is smooth, ignore him?

God will be always be there for us; whether we call on him or not is entirely up to us. I too, forget to call on him sometimes. Let us always make it our point to call on God regardless of good and bad times.

A Reflection on Ps 115...

n the Christmas Broadcast of 1939, the King of England had this message:

"I said to the man at the gate of the year; 'Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.' He replied, 'Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God. That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way'"

When I first started my discernment, I asked God to give me a clear sign and a sure way to know my vocation. But we all know that God does not work that way.

In our journey to respond to God's call, all, if not most of us, do not know or are unsure of our way. For me, even after entering the seminary, I still feel that I'm walking in the dark. All I can do is to put my hand into God's hand and trust Him to lead me

As the psalmist of Psalm 115 says "I trusted even when I said my soul is afflicted. And when I said in my alarm, no man can be trusted" Like the psalmist, I have to learn to trust God, that He will lead me on the right path and help me make the right choice. And I believe that He will be with us every step of the way

Pride

After watching the Star Wars prequel, I thought to myself ‘It was pride that did him in’. ‘Him’ being Anakin Skywalker. But after further reflection, I felt that there was more to pride that led to his downfall; impatience, thirst for power and position and most of all, approval from people around him, especially his mentor and friend, Obi Wan Kenobi.

In retrospect, many of us are, in some ways, have these traits in us. Whether we like it or not, whether we acknowledge it or not, most if not all of us have a certain amount of pride in us. In some ways, pride is quite healthy. For instance, we have every right to take pride in our achievements and success. As long as we do not use it to gloat or lord it over others, taking pride in our achievements is a healthy way to enhance our self esteem.

Pride becomes dangerous when we use it to belittle others. It becomes unhealthy when we use it to look down on others, to think that we are one class above the rest. That is when it becomes dangerous. Pride, as we all well know, is one of the seven capital, or cardinal sins.

Uncontrolled or unchecked pride is like poison, which will eat us up from the inside and, in the end, destroy us and those around us. Because of our pride, we can never admit that we have a problem. Just like Anakin Skywalker, he blames his fate on everyone else but himself. And as we can see from the third episode, that pride cost him his wife and his own physical body, turning him into a machine.

We may not think that we will end up like that. ‘I’m ok. The rest are just jealous of me’ are thoughts that we might have. Like it or not, when we begin to think that way, we start our journey into the land of self centeredness and selfishness. We begin to think that everyone is out to get us just because we are smart or successful.

To me, I feel that people with enormous pride should be aware of the danger they are getting into. The phrase ‘The higher they are, the harder they fall’ is something which we are all familiar with, I’m sure. There are many who do not or do not want to realize the destructive force of excessive pride, The craving for success has so clouded their mind and vision that they would simply refuse to acknowledge that flaw in them.

It was pride that made the chief priests and Pharisees jealous of Jesus. They were afraid that their popularity would slip away from their hands and that they would lose the respect of the society. And so they decided to kill Jesus. The same thing happened to the Apostles too. They were imprisoned and warned not to preach the Good News because the authorities feared that they would lose their power over the people. And these has continued until today, even within the Church.

We only have look at ourselves. When we organize activities or do something, we take pride and say “I’ve done such a magnificent job” Sadly, we sometimes fail to see God’s hand in all that we do. Without God’s blessings and help, all that we do will not succeed. Once we direct the glory to ourselves and not to God, we begin our journey into the valley of pride.

How do we, then conquer this sin of pride? It is indeed very difficult to do so. The first monumental step is to acknowledge to ourselves that we have a problem and that is pride. When we can honestly do that, half the battle would has been won.

Of course, we can never do it alone. But with God’s grace will help us to overcome this battle. Often we feel that we are too sinful to be forgiven. But we often forget that it is God’s grace that enables us to be forgiven. His grace alone is sufficient to redeem us from our sins and lead us to a new beginning in life. It will never be easy, however. But unless we go through this cleansing and ‘operation’, we will never be free of the pride that is in us. And if we do not learn how to control it, we will one day end up like Anakin Skywalker – Darth Vader. We would ultimately destroy ourselves and everyone one that is dear and precious to us.

"Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall." (Proverbs 16:18) (NIV)

Growing in the Spirit

I’m sure that most of us know that the Holy Spirit can help us live a good Christian life. Either that or we can make it difficult for it to work in our lives. St. Paul, in his letter to the Ephesians tells us that “For this reason I bow my knees before the Father…that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His spirit in the inner man” (cf Eph 3:14-16)

Paul was asking the Holy Spirit to strengthen the Christians in Ephesus. In the New Testament, we can see that the Holy Spirit is the key to victory over sin and to living a holy life. The Holy Spirit provides spiritual power for ministry and to help us understand the Bible. These are the few examples in which the Holy Spirit works through us. All of this can only happen when we are “walking in” or filled with” the Holy Spirit.

There are people in this world who think that the key to victory over sin is self punishment, doing penance and abstinence. This is essentially pre Vatican thinking. St. Paul himself tells us that the key to living a holy life as a Christian is to walk in the Spirit. As Christians, we are commanded to walk in the Spirit since the Spirit is already living in us. (Read Gal 5:25)

When we start to walk in the Spirit, we will not be constantly sinning, no one can escape sin but the Holy Spirit can help us to lessen it. Once we start to faithfully and constantly walk in the Spirit, we will grow in the Spirit and the fruits of it will also bloom.

On our own effort, we will not be able to live a good Christian life, which is why God gave us the Holy Spirit so that we can continuously grow and receive God’s grace. The Holy Spirit lives in us and will never leave us. Whether we let it do something in our lives is up to us. God gave us that choice.

How do we experience the fullness of the Holy Spirit’s work in our lives? First and foremost, we need to respond to its promptings. We should try to listen to what the Spirit is trying to tell us, what is it that it wants us to do. We should obediently follow its lead.

The Spirit is the power source of our Christian life. We are empowered by it if we obediently respond by faith. This is a gradual process. We need to continually submit our attitude, actions, decisions and lives to the Spirit. (Read Rom 8:5) Obedience is always difficult, That is why we have to continually ask the Holy Spirit to help us to be obedient to its promptings. In this way, we will slowly grow. Some may say that “Oh, I have attended LSS and that is enough growth for me” LSS is only a means to recharge our spirit and to guide us to follow the Holy Spirit that is in us.

How then, do we respond to this Spirit that God gave us? First we have to acknowledge that we are not superman/woman, we have to be honest and tell ourselves that we need the Holy Spirit in our lives. The second one is to go for confession on a regular basis, twice a month is good enough. This will help us to gauge how much we have grown in the Spirit. And lastly, we need to commit our lives to the one who gave it to us, God. “seek ye first the kingdom of God and all things will be given unto you”

We may not be able to see our own growth. But no matter how difficult life is, we must never give up, we have to faithfully believe that we are growing, no matter how slow. Life is definitely challenging, without challenges, we will not be able to realise the power of the Spirit.

If we follow the wisdom of the Spirit, it will guide and protect us. It will never fail us.

Growing in the Spirit

I’m sure that most of us know that the Holy Spirit can help us live a good Christian life. Either that or we can make it difficult for it to work in our lives. St. Paul, in his letter to the Ephesians tells us that “For this reason I bow my knees before the Father…that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His spirit in the inner man” (cf Eph 3:14-16)

Paul was asking the Holy Spirit to strengthen the Christians in Ephesus. In the New Testament, we can see that the Holy Spirit is the key to victory over sin and to living a holy life. The Holy Spirit provides spiritual power for ministry and to help us understand the Bible. These are the few examples in which the Holy Spirit works through us. All of this can only happen when we are “walking in” or filled with” the Holy Spirit.

There are people in this world who think that the key to victory over sin is self punishment, doing penance and abstinence. This is essentially pre Vatican thinking. St. Paul himself tells us that the key to living a holy life as a Christian is to walk in the Spirit. As Christians, we are commanded to walk in the Spirit since the Spirit is already living in us. (Read Gal 5:25)

When we start to walk in the Spirit, we will not be constantly sinning, no one can escape sin but the Holy Spirit can help us to lessen it. Once we start to faithfully and constantly walk in the Spirit, we will grow in the Spirit and the fruits of it will also bloom.

On our own effort, we will not be able to live a good Christian life, which is why God gave us the Holy Spirit so that we can continuously grow and receive God’s grace. The Holy Spirit lives in us and will never leave us. Whether we let it do something in our lives is up to us. God gave us that choice.

How do we experience the fullness of the Holy Spirit’s work in our lives? First and foremost, we need to respond to its promptings. We should try to listen to what the Spirit is trying to tell us, what is it that it wants us to do. We should obediently follow its lead.

The Spirit is the power source of our Christian life. We are empowered by it if we obediently respond by faith. This is a gradual process. We need to continually submit our attitude, actions, decisions and lives to the Spirit. (Read Rom 8:5) Obedience is always difficult, That is why we have to continually ask the Holy Spirit to help us to be obedient to its promptings. In this way, we will slowly grow. Some may say that “Oh, I have attended LSS and that is enough growth for me” LSS is only a means to recharge our spirit and to guide us to follow the Holy Spirit that is in us.

How then, do we respond to this Spirit that God gave us? First we have to acknowledge that we are not superman/woman, we have to be honest and tell ourselves that we need the Holy Spirit in our lives. The second one is to go for confession on a regular basis, twice a month is good enough. This will help us to gauge how much we have grown in the Spirit. And lastly, we need to commit our lives to the one who gave it to us, God. “seek ye first the kingdom of God and all things will be given unto you”

We may not be able to see our own growth. But no matter how difficult life is, we must never give up, we have to faithfully believe that we are growing, no matter how slow. Life is definitely challenging, without challenges, we will not be able to realise the power of the Spirit.

If we follow the wisdom of the Spirit, it will guide and protect us. It will never fail us.

A Reflection on Psalm 19...

A priest observed a woman sitting in the empty church with her head in her hands. An hour passed. Then two. Still she was there.
Judging her to be a soul in distress, and eager to be of help, he went up to the woman and said "Is there any way I can be of help?"
"No thank you, Father. I've been getting all the help I need"
I can relate to this story well because I have personally gone through it. When times are hard and I'm faced with trials and difficulties, I often sit before the Blessed Sacrament and prayed.
Usually I'm able to find strength and comfort from this exercise. Just as the psalmist of Ps 19 says "May the Lord answer in time of trial, may the name of Jacob's God protect you...", I have found that God will answer my prayer in times of trial.
All we have to do is to go before him humbly and seeking his help.... he will reply.

当我在路上跌倒时候
许多人走过但是无人挽救

耶稣来张开他的双手

轻轻的说不要泪流

因为拥有我的爱已经足够

哦主耶稣你是我的最爱
因为你我存在
有你在我不怕受伤害

全心全意赞美你朝拜你

你是我的唯一

我会永远爱你跟你在一起

我们永远不分离

跟随你我不会再回头
所有困难痛苦我都愿意接收

在你怀抱里感到温柔

求你不要放手

因为我要跟随你跟到最后

哦主给我力量跟你一起走

哦主耶稣你是我的最爱

我需要你宽怀

有你就有美好的未来

全灵全力赞美你朝拜你

谁能把你代替

世界上最好的朋友还是你

我不愿意失去你

A Reflection on Ps 50...

A teacher gave a test in school and told the class that at its end, they would correct one another's papers. He also stipulated that everyone would have to pass, otherwise the class could not leave the room.
Several of the test results were very poor and a heated argument ensued about it being unfair to pass people who just did not have the right answers. But after long discussions, much as the group hated to, they had to pass everyone; otherwise everyone had to stay back after school.
This is similar to forgiveness. It is easy to ask God for forgiveness but when it comes to forgiving, it is difficult.
When I was in Form Four, a friend whom I trusted went behind my back and betrayed me. I found it very difficult to forgive but I eventually did.
The psalmist of Ps 50 asks for God's mercy and compassion. He says "Have mercy on me God in your kindness. In your compassion blot out my offence" As we reflect on the words from this psalm, let us ask ourselves whether there is unforgiveness in our hearts.
If there is, let us then ask God to give us the grace to forgive. For if there is even one person whom we cannot forgive, we cannot rightly say the Lord's Prayer and we certainly have no right to ask for God's mercy and compassion.

Success and Failure

“No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out” (1 Cor 10:13)

All of us do not want to fail, I’m sure. From when we were young up to whatever point we are at now, we are always taught by our parents and teachers that failure is something disgraceful, that those who fail are often those ousted by society. Even the mass media, through novels, movies etc give us the impression that failure is something unacceptable. Because of this preconceived concept, we grow up not wanting to fail, we think of failure as a disease that we should avoid at all cost. This is especially in universities and colleges everywhere. We often find that students study night and day because they do not want to fail. I’m not saying that it’s not good but I’ll elaborate later.

So, what is success? Of course, everyone knows what it is, to achieve something good in life, to pass exams with flying colours, get a high paying job and so on. Success is something good but sometimes the quest for it makes us into what we are not. Sometimes we thirst so much for success that we do not care what happens to others or ourselves. We become self centered and envious because we are not able to be like others. This isn’t right. But it is because of the external pressures that we face. Modern society tends to measure success with results and qualifications, with material goods and position. If we are not rich or we do not have good paper qualifications, we are considered to be a failure. Success should not be measured by all this. What’s the use of being successful academically but we become miserable?

Many people want to be perfect because that’s what success is, partly. No one is perfect except God. Why must we become who we are not? God has made us in His own image and no matter what happens, we are always beautiful and perfect in His eyes. No one can be always successful from the moment he is born until the day he dies. Even Jesus was not always successful. A question that we should ask ourselves is this; is the craving for success so great that we lose ourselves in the process? The Bible says, for what does a man gain if he wins the world but loses the possession of his soul? If we lose our soul because of success, then what’s the use of it?

Failure on the other hand, is looked at as a negative aspect in life. Perhaps that’s true. I mean, no one in his right mind would want to fail, would you? Failure tends to bring you down, it makes one loses confidence and sometimes our life. I remember a case in our college where a girl hanged herself because she was afraid that she wouldn’t pass her exam. This is a case where one crumbles under pressure but I’m sure none of you will do that. Before I write further, you might ask what do I know about failure? Let me share my experiences of failure with you.

First, I failed my first year certificate, so I had to repeat the entire year. When I took my exams the second round, I had to resit some papers. My second year certificate I also had to resit some papers.. History repeated itself when I was doing my Diploma, this time i failed totally and had to repeat the entire year of study. The second time I took the exam, I had to resit 4 papers, the maximum allowable. I don’t know how many of you have experienced this, if you have please let me know. But I’m very sure resits are something common, right? Almost everyone has gone through it. My point is this, if I hadn’t experienced all this failure, I wouldn’t be the person that I am today. Because I failed, I was able to find God and experienced His love. The song “Strong and Constant” is a good example of what I’m trying to point out. It goes like this “When you find sorrow within your life, I will come, I will embrace your heart, Through your pain you will discover Me, Strong and constant is My love” Through my pain I have discovered God

Because I had failed before, I was able to accept many things in life. I learned to accept failure as part of life because without failure, there can never be success. Manny great people failed many times before succeeding. Examples are Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Edison and Isaac Newton. But because they were able to accept their failures and pick themselves up again, they were made stronger in their determination and will. People who have never failed before find it hard to search for God because they feel that they are too great, they do not need God. It is very hard for a successful person to find God’s love. Of course, there are some but these are rare indeed.

Sometimes we have to ask ourselves why are we afraid of failing? Is it because we fear that we will be rejected by our friends? Or is it because we fear that our parents will consider us stupid? Christ asks us not to be afraid because we only have to ask for His grace, then we will be able to face life. We should not be afraid to fail, I’m not asking you to fail but if it’s unavoidable, we should be able to accept it because it is only when we fail that we will succeed eventually. Why? Because success is failure turned inside out. Success and failure normally come hand in hand and I strongly believe it’s better to suffer first than succeed first because the higher we are, the harder we fall.

So be not afraid to fail. Failure is not just something to be feared but to be accepted as a part of life. It is easier for those who have failed to receive God’s love than those who have never failed before.

A reflection on a verse from Ps32

In the movie Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith, there is a scene where Anakin Skywalker is seen consulting Jedi Master Yoda, it was a matter concerning attachment.

I remember Yoda saying, “You must free yourself from all that you fear to lose. Attachment leads to jealousy, that is a shadow of greed.”

In a way, the life of a Jedi is similar to a priest. In fact, George Lucas based the Jedi character on the priesthood. They cannot be attached to anything or anyone.

I often ask myself, “Can I free myself from the things I fear to lose?”

In Psalm 32, the psalmist says this, “The Lord looks on those who revere him, on those who hope in his love, to rescue their souls from death, to keep them alive in famine”

I may have all kinds of material things. The question is, will it save my soul from death? If I were to lose all my money or perhaps my books, will I die?

By freeing myself, and ourselves from these worldly attachments, we can learn to put our hope in the Lord, for it is only through him that we can have eternal life

Love

“Love one another as I have loved you” is the greatest commandment of God. God Himself showed His unconditional love by sending His only Son to die for us – while we were still sinners. No one will ever be capable of such an action.

Many of us, I believe, at one point or another, have nurtured a feeling of hatred towards another, be they our parents, brothers, sisters or friends. However, feelings are something normal because of our human nature. Strangely enough, we often come across God’s teachings to love, not to hate.

Many times too, God was angry with His people, but that anger never graduated to hatred. His commandment has always been to love, and thus, He is asking us to do the same.

So what is this “love”? The Oxford’s Dictionary defines love as a warm liking or affection for something or someone. This is a very general meaning because love cannot be described in words but by actions. Personally, I think there are two kinds of love – conditional and unconditional love.

Conditional love is when we put conditions on our feelings. For example, we love a person because he/she is rich or beautiful/handsome, or even because they can be of use to us, and they also can be at our disposal. This kind of love is relatively not good because we would be abusing love to use it for our own good. We should not love a person because of his/her possessions, or outward appearance, or because he/she can provide us with the things we need.

We should instead love a person for what or who he/she is. This is unconditional love. Many people in this world are in dire need of another’s love and affection. Unwanted babies and children, orphans, the elderly and the sick, and especially the outcasts are the people who really need love, because modern society totally detests them.

However, we need not go to the extreme. We can always show our unconditional love to the people around us, especially those whom we hold dear. More often than not, it is the people closest to us whom we find difficult to love. There are times when it hurts to love, especially when our love is not appreciated. However, whether it is appreciated or not, we must try our best to love them.

Our expression of love does not have to be anything big. Simple things like calling them up once in a while, sending them cards, e-mails, SMSs, remembering their birthdays and so on are simple and sincere gestures that can be used to express our unconditional love. It is to those whom we dislike that we must show our love, and especially if he/she is our brother/sister in Christ.

If we cannot love our brother/sister in Christ, how can we love God? Anyone who says he/she loves God but hates his/her friends or brothers/sisters is a liar! If we cannot love someone who we can see, how can we claim to love someone whom we cannot see?

I think it is time for us to start loving one anther, because by doing so, we can truly make this world a better place to live in. If we do not start now, we might never have the chance to do it anymore. Instead we will end up regretting our actions for the rest of our lives.

“We can always give without loving, but we can never LOVE without giving”

Seek Ye First...

"Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all other things shall be added unto you"

I am very sure that everyone has come across this phrase before, either in the Bible or in one of the songs that we sing in church. I think it needs no explanation because I believe everyone knows what it means. But how many of us, especially students, really say it with meaning? How many of us are really practicing or living it? I dare say that only a handful is living it in their lives.

I believe many of us are born and baptised as Catholics. But very often, we take our faith for granted. Converts are different in the sense that they found their faith and this makes them stronger. But both born Catholics and converts have something in common; both are children of God and have the same Lord. A Catholic student would normally just go for mass on Sundays to fulfil his/her obligations “I have fulfilled my obligations, don’t ask more of me” “I’m busy” “I have to study” are some of the excuses given when you ask them to go for camps or rallies. Some don’t even go to mass except on Good Friday and Christmas.

One question arises here, is it enough to attend one mass per week? You can give a million and one excuses for not attending mass and the most common reason is “No time” God gave us 24 hours a day and all He asks of us is 1 to 2 hours to be with Him. These days everyone spends a lot of time studying, going for movies or going online and neglecting God altogether. When we do badly in our exams, we blame God, we blame everyone except ourselves.

“Seek ye first…” again this phrase comes in. We do not realise that by neglecting our faith and seeking worldly gains, we are only cheating ourselves. When we learn to seek the will of God and His righteousness, He will grant us many blessings that are always much more than what we can dare to think of! Having material goods and wealth will not make us happy or contented. Even if it does, it will eventually dry up. By seeking God’s kingdom first, “…all other things will be added unto you”, it may not be wealth, fame or honour but peace, happiness, love, joy and little simple things in life and it is these that make our lives complete, whole and worth living.

Seeking God’s kingdom does not mean becoming a priest or a nun. It means spending time with Him and serving Him through our brothers and sister in Christ in whatever way we can. There should be a balance between studying and serving God. We ask God for so many things yet we are not willing to spend time with Him.

“…and it shall be given unto you” Asking for something without seeking for it will not bring any result. In conclusion, I say again “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, all other things shall be added unto you”

If you constantly seek, you will definitely find what you are looking for